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How to Handle Demanding Realtors

The Realtor calls at 7:00 pm on a Friday evening, and without saying hello or offering any pleasantries, wants to know the status of a file.

Before you can respond you sense they’re perturbed, like the world is about to come to an end if you don’t give them the answer they need.



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Communicating with this type of Realtor can be difficult, especially if you’re uneasy with confrontation. However, when you understand the demanding Realtor’s behavioral style, you’ll know precisely how to handle them with better ease.

Why are demanding Realtors demanding?

Demanding Realtors are people who feel the need for control. They are very assertive, less responsive to others, highly objective and task oriented. They make an effort to tell people with their assertiveness. We call them “control freaks.”

They’re selective listeners and have blind spots concerning awareness of others’ viewpoints. They may overstep prerogatives and be blunt and sarcastic with others. They believe that nothing is impossible and are comfortable expressing their opinion even if it’s confrontational.

Demanding Realtors are independent, determined and controlling. Often they choose to complete a task themselves instead of delegating it. They figure the time it takes to explain the task would be the same amount of time to complete it. So why bother when they can do it themselves.

Why are demanding Realtors misunderstood?

It’s not easy to work with a demanding Realtor when they’re being demanding. But what many loan officers don’t realize is that a demanding Realtor places “tasks” and “things” as first priority, and “people” and “feelings” as second. In other words, they’re driven to accomplish a task and don’t always account for people’s emotions.

Although this isn’t always acceptable behavior, the best thing you can do is not to take their actions personally. Like water rolling off a duck’s back, you should realize that they actually don’t mean to hurt your feelings. They can be intense with you about completing an important task during one moment, but the next moment, after the task is completed, they can be inviting you out for happy hour.

How to handle demanding situations

The most important key is to remain cool and not get rattled. Respect their sense of urgency by being deliberate and to the point. It’s definitely not the time to being warm and fuzzy. They prefer a very business-like demeanor.

When they call you by telephone, you can grab a few moments to collect yourself by placing them on hold while you get the file. It’s better to have them hold for a minute rather than lose your composure. This way you can take a deep breath to gather yourself, and quickly view the file so you’re prepared.

Provide accurate facts and figures about probability of success. Don’t speculate wildly or leave any uncertainty. They want to know that their problems are being solved or are going to be solved. Answers like, “I’m not sure…,” or, “Gee, I don’t know…,” don’t sit well with them.

Don’t appeal to their emotional side, instead motivate and persuade by referring to objectives and results. For example, if they’re questioning about a file closing on time, don’t say things like, “Don’t worry, I’ve got everything under control,” or “There’s nothing to worry about, this one is a slam dunk.” Instead they want to hear things that relate to their objective – the loan closing on time. “I’ll have doc’s to title 2 days before closing,” or “Everything is on track for closing to take place tomorrow at 2:00 p.m. as planned.”

What makes demanding Realtors tick?

Demanding Realtors have their upside. They’re very competitive and always seek the next biggest challenge. They like to achieve things that few others have.

Know their competition and use it as a motivator. Demanding Realtors don’t like finishing second. If they’re not the #1 Realtor in their farm than they’re having some restless nights.



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